Monday, June 1, 2009

Why I Love Geoff

On Saturday night, we went to a party at the Vets' Hall in Morro Bay celebrating the baptism of Luis' son Isaac.

We met up with Annie, Mike & Joey so all us "white folk who drive Ford Fusions and have babies in Chicco strollers" would arrive at the same time. Strength in numbers sorta thing.

When we got there, I looked around: I'm guessing there were 150 people at this thing and we were 6 (including our babies) of 7 white people there. We were also severely under dressed, wearing jeans and cotton shirts. How was I supposed to know?! Isaac was wearing a white tuxedo, for crying outloud!

We all had a good time, enjoying DELICIOUS Mexican food (homemade flour tortillas, people, and the best tamales of my LIFE) and drinking Tecate out of cans.

After the babies had had enough of the IMPOSSIBLY loud and slightly off-key mariachi music, we headed back to Annie and Mike's place for a beer and to visit.

Phoebe lasted through 1 beer before we had to head back home.

That is, heading back home via a drive on a winding road that takes about 20 minutes.

During which she cried the ENTIRE TIME mostly because she wanted to nurse and go to sleep.

To try and distract her from my boobs which were behind the steering wheel of a car going 60 miles per hour, Geoff and I started our Vaudeville "entertain the baby" routine, which goes something like this:

We sing songs.

We clap our hands (well, he did).

We say words she loves "Froggie! Doggie! I'm gonna gitchoo!"

And so forth.

Nothing was working.

So Geoff pulled out an oldie, but a goodie, from our "This car ride is taking FOREVER and I'm going to LOSE IT if you don't cheer me up" bag of tricks. Geoff came up with this one before Phoebe was born and I'm pretty sure he hasn't done it since she was born.

We call it "The Pickle Vendor".

Geoff -- in high pitched voice -- tries to sell pickles.

"Hey -- who wants to buy a pickle? Want to buy a pickle? They're only 1 for a quarter!"

And by this time, I'm dying laughing because it'd been so long since he'd done it.

Phoebe was quiet.

Then ...

"Pickles ... anyone want to buy pickles? They're only 1 for a quarter! Two for a dollar!"

I'm barely able to steer because of how ridiculous this is (and the high pitched voice kills me).

Phoebe was crying and laughing.

And the killer (the best part of the routine)

"Pickles here! 1 for a quarter! Two for a dollar. Three for five dollars!!"

It's that the guy (the pickle vendor) is trying to scam you (me) that kills me. "What a deal - THREE PICKLES FOR FIVE DOLLARS!" Geoff says in his high-pitched goofy voice.

Phoebe might not have been distracted enough to calm herself down, but I was laughing so hard I didn't care and made it home without totally losing my mind.

I'll take those small victories when I can get them.

1 comment:

Annie said...

LOL! I've had Joey scream all the way home from work before. Unfortunately, all I can do at his age is turn up the radio... bad mommy!